Posted on Tuesday 17th of October 2006 at 05:34 in The Internet

Friends don't let friends send chain mail

Another normal day in the office means another day of normal frustrations but what has really managed to irritate me today is how chain mail still exists. How is it that so many people use the Internet on such a regular basis (and by extension becoming wiser) and yet I still receive chain mail like I did in the 90's.

How is it that times have changed and yet there are still people who forward me utter rubbish? Even spam has changed with the times and yet I still receive emails telling me "MSN will delete your account if you don't forward this to 10 people to prove your account is active" or "Johnny is from Iran and has 4 toes, please forward this on or you will be hit with a shovel for the rest of your life".

Most annoying of all are the mails that claim if you send it on to 20 friends, something will appear on your screen telling you who your "life love" is going to be. Now, understanding technology a little (being a web developer and all) sort of ruins the illusion for me, because it purely cannot happen. What amazes me is not that these mails exist but more that people still send them - I mean, there's something to be said for the triumph of hope over experience but this is more the triumph of stupidity.

I can only assume these are the exact same users who help spread viruses by downloading I_love_you.exe from their inbox. I'm afraid if I ever came to any position of power I would enforce a law (somehow) that if chain mail was sent that wasn't deemed funny, the sender would be punched in the face once a minute, 8 hours a day, for 3 days.

"Even spam has evolved, why hasn't chain mail"

It may seem harsh but I'm tired of receiving chain letters - obviously they sneak past spam filters because they're from "friends". Friends don't let friends send chain mail. Personally I blame sites such as Myspace for continuing the illusion that this behaviour is acceptable (oh so many bulletins acting as chain mail). It's almost enough to unplug from the internet and move into the mountains, away from claims of Bill Gates paying $1 for every person who forwards this email.

Let me clarify, no one will EVER pay you for irritating your friends with chain mail. Bill Gates will not save little Johnny because of an email (if Johnny existed). MSN will not close your account, nor ask you to pay unless you reply (do you honestly think a service provider's only means of monitoring your activities is whether you reply to your email or not?). Sort it out.

Appreciated that Seopher.com only reaches users who are more likely to give a lap-dance to Stephen Hawking than send chain mail - but I'm almost certain the majority of people have received some - so please, join my cause:

Friends don't let friends send chain mail - punch them in the face if they do

Please, let's ditch chain mail people. It's 2006 (nearly 2007) so let's start acting like it.

 

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